Treatment of Ben: fair, unfair or about right?

[whisper]

We all know Ben wasn't an angel his entire career off the field, that's a given

And, the long and short of it, he was never even charged for rape, let alone convicted of it. The Browns' fans who refer to him as "Rape-lis-berger" are just jealous fools. It strongly appears that whatever happened in that GA college bar bathroom was not rape. It was, perhaps, some foul, ungentlemanly, gross behavior, but not rape. It sounds like the girl was so blasted she had no memory of what happened and her girlfriends were the ones claiming rape, without knowing what even happened.



Regardless, Ben gets treated by the media as him having been guilty of some perverse act...or many acts. Even today, while bringing up his retirement, they still add in, "Yes, he had a lot of off the field issues," while usually not mentioning what they were. But if I didn't know any better, I would assume they were right: He must have really screwed up and been caught in all kinds of sordid acts."

So what were they? You had one instance of a rape allegation, that never even led to him being charged of any act. (Other athletes did acts that went further including Kobe Bryant.) You had him involved in an accident where he wasn't wearing a helmet while riding his motorcycle; Excuse me, is that a crime? Word was he skipped out of some bars leaving a bar tab unpaid. Not cool, but in his mind he probably thought his presence rang up the cash register like a pin ball machine, if true.

And many of us, have admitted, even in here, that we were "piggish" enough without being a millionaire and football god in our 20's, and who knows how bad we would have been had we lived in Ben's shoes?

But all of that said, do you think the media is fair in how they narrate Ben's past? Has he really done all that much to deserve such an asterisk when mentioning him and his inclusion into the Hall of Fame? I don't think so. He was no choir boy, but was he really so bad to constantly mention his acts as a 20-something year-old? None of them criminal? What am I missing?

[Chucktownsteeler]

I could be biased but I think Ben has been treated unfairly by the media, by the NFL, by referees, and by some fans in general (in cluding Steeler fans).

But again, I could be bias.

[Starlifter]

many of us are jaggovs without having the millions to go with it - so I tend not to get too wrapped up about Ben in his youth. The allegations were serious, but that's ultimately all they were - allegations. We've all heard the rumors - but much like Kordell in Schenley Park, just because a rumor flies around the 'burg doesn't make it so.

The truth however is his legacy off the field will be forever complicated and with an asterisk beside it. He says he wants to spend the rest of his life in Pittsburgh. I hope he does, I hope he gives back to the community. I hope he becomes the guy people are happy to come across because he is gracious, outgoing, generous and appreciative.

Because as much as we all loved his play on the field - I suspect the tolerance for boorish behavior will always be rather short. I'm not saying that's right or even fair - but such is life.

[papillon]

I'll always be in the unfair category, the events in Vegas and Georgia are always brought up as if they are true, but since none of the accusers ever brought the receipts with the charges the whole narrative should have been dropped years ago. Just because someone says it, doesn't make it true, it needs to be proven, none of the allegations were ever brought to a court room, so, for me, either bring the receipts or don;t bring it up as if its true.

Pappy

[steeler_fan_in_t.o.]

When I saw this post I thought of something. In Georgia, the DA pretty much stated that he was dying to charge Ben but there was nothing to charge him with. It makes perfect sense that the allegation was false. Drunk girl follows him from bar to bar, willingly goes into the bathroom with him, the have sex, she states there was forced sex, her friends say there was, she then claims rape.

However, what if that same thing happened today? Does a DA charge him and put the onus on the Ben to prove that she was able to consent? It is a different world we live in now compared to even 10-15 years ago.

[WindyCitySteel]

When I saw this post I thought of something. In Georgia, the DA pretty much stated that he was dying to charge Ben but there was nothing to charge him with. It makes perfect sense that the allegation was false. Drunk girl follows him from bar to bar, willingly goes into the bathroom with him, the have sex, she states there was forced sex, her friends say there was, she then claims rape.

However, what if that same thing happened today? Does a DA charge him and put the onus on the Ben to prove that she was able to consent? It is a different world we live in now compared to even 10-15 years ago.

That DA got him suspended and vilified with his irresponsible theatrics. She told the police "no" the first two times questioned, but in the morning said "yes" after consulting with her friends who were with her, one of whom referred to Ben as "that rapist" when they first met up with him.

[Northern_Blitz]

Ultimately, we'll never know. And I strongly believe in the presumption of innocence.

But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have wanted to leave my daughters alone with Ben of that time (if the ages lined up).

Just like I wouldn't want people I loved to hang out with Ray Lewis.

I do think it's true that the league would come down much harder on someone in that situation now. Although it's not like Watson is being treated all that much worse even though those accusation are at least equally serious and certainly far more numerous.

[WindyCitySteel]

Ultimately, we'll never know. And I strongly believe in the presumption of innocence.

But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have wanted to leave my daughters alone with Ben of that time (if the ages lined up).

Nobody left these girls with Ben, they followed him around with DTF pins on and gladly slurped down free drinks.

[Ghost]

About the incidents with the women – absolutely unfair. There were signed affidavits from the Vegas woman’s co-workers saying she had said she was going to work him for a payout. I don’t believe for one second he assaulted her. She was a gold-digging whore. He settled to keep it quiet.

I think he put himself in a bad position going out to college bars as an adult, as the optics look bad. That said, I don’t think he attacked that girl either. When first reported, she said the man was 6’5” / 252 pounds. Who says 252? 250 or maybe 255. 252 was straight off ESPN (or somewhere on a website). And that red-neck, hillbilly of a DA in middle-of-nowhere GA, was dying to charge Ben. He would have sold his soul for the extra TV time. He dropped the charges b/c he knew they were bogus; the witness was a disaster, and he would have gotten crushed in court.

Motorcycle accident – fair. Ben was ignorant & arrogant not wearing a helmet. Being called out for being selfish and hurting the team was true.

Overall, his treatment almost always skews unfairly. Very little talk of the charity work he does. Off hand mentions of becoming a family man with a local wife and multiple children. His story could easily be written as one of redemption – successful 1^st rounder lets fame go to his head early in his career but then pulls it together to become a stand out citizen who cares about his community while being a great QB.

[SteelerOfDeVille]

Let's be honest - if this were Phillip Rivers or some QB from some other team, we'd be saying the same stuff about him. So, is the treatment unfair? Newp.

Even listening to everyone's vids about him, if i hear, "I'm proud of the family man that you've become", even his teammates acknowledge that there was a bit of a problem.

Let's be fair - Tom Brady's the GOAT... and I'm going asterisk his cheating arse every chance i get.... so yes... Ben deserve's it.

[Eich]

But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have wanted to leave my daughters alone with Ben of that time (if the ages lined up).

I wouldn't want my daughter wearing a DTF shirt, getting drunk and following ANY NFL player from bar to bar. Hell, growing up as a teen, I saw a lof of bad behavior even from non-athletes that would get a professional athlete suspended today if caught.

It's shocking to me that Antonio Brown hasn't been put in jail yet for far worse behavior. I guess he's lucky so far that the women he's mis-treated haven't proven enough yet.

I think Ben was the very unfortunate guy who got unfairly and incorrectly accused of sexual assault twice. No question he was stupid and an idiot for putting himself in those situations and his treatment of women (and pretty much everyone outside his circle) was very poor. But these girls weren't the only victims here. This follows Ben for his life. And I really feel for his kids. I wonder if anyone even knows the name of the girl in Georgia, outside her circle. Nothing really follows her except for the payout she was given.

[feltdizz]

Some of you sound crazy as hell. Answer this question.

If the same 2 incidents happened to Raven or Patriot player would you feel the same way?

Doubt it.

If it was just the first incident I could see why fans would be upset with it constantly being brought up but the second incident is where Ben really damaged his chance for total redemption.

It doesn’t matter if she had a sticker, a shirt that begged for it or if she flashed him and pulled him into the utility closet.

He put himself in a position to be accused and we have no idea what happened once he was in there.

So yes, the treatment he receives is right. He still had a standing O and a packed house. He will go into Canton. He will be loved by Steeler fans..

but his off field issues are also part of his past.

[Northern_Blitz]

Nobody left these girls with Ben, they followed him around with DTF pins on and gladly slurped down free drinks.

Sure.

Just saying that I wouldn't want people I loved to be in that position (whether they got themselves into it or not).

[Northern_Blitz]

I wouldn't want my daughter wearing a DTF shirt, getting drunk and following ANY NFL player from bar to bar. Hell, growing up as a teen, I saw a lof of bad behavior even from non-athletes that would get a professional athlete suspended today if caught.

It's shocking to me that Antonio Brown hasn't been put in jail yet for far worse behavior. I guess he's lucky so far that the women he's mis-treated haven't proven enough yet.

I think Ben was the very unfortunate guy who got unfairly and incorrectly accused of sexual assault twice. No question he was stupid and an idiot for putting himself in those situations and his treatment of women (and pretty much everyone outside his circle) was very poor. But these girls weren't the only victims here. This follows Ben for his life. And I really feel for his kids. I wonder if anyone even knows the name of the girl in Georgia, outside her circle. Nothing really follows her except for the payout she was given.

Also true.

I think behavior matters a lot.

And like those girls, Ben chose his behavior. And given that he was never convicted, I believe that his behavior was legal.

But there are lots of legal behaviors I don't think are good.

[feltdizz]

I wouldn't want my daughter wearing a DTF shirt, getting drunk and following ANY NFL player from bar to bar. Hell, growing up as a teen, I saw a lof of bad behavior even from non-athletes that would get a professional athlete suspended today if caught.

It's shocking to me that Antonio Brown hasn't been put in jail yet for far worse behavior. I guess he's lucky so far that the women he's mis-treated haven't proven enough yet.

I think Ben was the very unfortunate guy who got unfairly and incorrectly accused of sexual assault twice. No question he was stupid and an idiot for putting himself in those situations and his treatment of women (and pretty much everyone outside his circle) was very poor. But these girls weren't the only victims here. This follows Ben for his life. And I really feel for his kids. I wonder if anyone even knows the name of the girl in Georgia, outside her circle. Nothing really follows her except for the payout she was given.

I have 2 daughters and wouldn’t want them wearing a DTF sticker. But if they did it wouldn’t excuse a man’s behavior if they said they were assaulted.

Just because a woman talks nasty, dresses nasty, acts nasty or teases a guy, it doesn’t mean they no longer have the ability to say no or refuse advances.

I will definitely tell my girls that behavior like I just described will most likely lead to men behaving aggressively or foolishly but no woman ever loses their right to protect themselves because they were drinking too much or wearing a sticker.