It has been reported today that the football Pittsburgh Steelers' coach, Mr. Mike Tomlin, has not indicated plans to unleash hell in the wake of the team's horrifying loss to the ghoulish Oakland Raiders football club this afternoon. The prospect of life not ending in screaming pain as brimstone rained down on themselves and loved ones tonight or tomorrow has reportedly added a marginally positive aspect to the otherwise miserable existence of the fans of the football Pittsburgh Steelers team tonight.
There are scattered reports however that some of the fans are demanding that the coach actually reverse himself and call for the End Times to begin, as they are reportedly having difficulty with the inconsistency of the Mr. Tomlin's responses to similar events in the past. "He's got to earn our respect, it's not automatic", Mr. Anthony Rogalovsky posted via Twitter today. "If he is going to be all over the map when these same things happen over and over, well that just won't cut it", he added. "If it's for PR/marketing reasons that he's holding back on telling us we are going to be ripped apart by minions of the Antichrist as we watch our families being thrown into burning pits, well maybe he's better suited to be the coach of some team with more "sensitive" fans, like the Seahawks or the Cowboys", Mr. Rogolovsky added, as his wife nodded her approval at his side.
In further news: The NFL Players' Association has filed a preliminary injunction against the Steelers for having their physicians schedule surgical implants of Velcro onto the fingertips of their skill players (an operation commonly referred to as "The Gecko Procedure"), claiming it should not be considered to fall within the usual "...consents to all training and therapy to achieve and maintain peak fitness" clause of the CBA (Collective Bargaining Agreement). NFL owners have indicated they plan to respond by claiming the team physicians are independent agents, not employees of, or acting at the direction of, the NFL itself, and thus the procedure should be exempt, and can be scheduled and performed. More to follow ...
Coach Mike Tomlin post-game vs. Raiders
Posted by Teresa Varley on September 23, 2012 Ė 8:43 pm
Opening Comment: That was a poor performance by us. When you play like that you lose football games. Not enough stops on defense. We turned the ball over on offense. We gave up a big return or two which provided field position, a shot in the arm in the kicking game and allowed them to respond to some scores. I would like to tip my hat to the Oakland Raiders. They played winning ball. That is not the style of ball that we desire to play. You are going to lose when you play like that, as we did today. We have got to chew on this one for a while, obviously. Itís not going to go down easy, as it should not go down easy. It wonít define us. Weíll go back to work. Weíll continue to search for areas of improvement, which are many.
Did you intend to go for it all along on fourth down?
I intended to go all along. I wasnít going to punt the football to them. We hadnít stopped them enough in the second half to do that. It was inside of one. If you canít get inside of one you deserve to lose games. I wonít hesitate to do that.
Was there any reason you werenít able to stop them defensively or was it lack of execution?
Not very good execution by us, but at the same token you tip your hat to them because they did execute in critical moments and made the necessary plays. I donít want to take anything away from them, but obviously we expect more and better from ourselves.
Did you ever think about slowing down the pace in the fourth quarter?
I wasnít concerned about the pace; I was concerned about our quality of play and our ability to maintain possession of the ball. We turned the ball over some and that was a defining factor for us at least offensively.
Antonio Brown had a couple of drops and one got away. Your thoughts on that with the game he had?
We turned the ball over. We canít do that, not only him but us collectively. He wasnít the only one.