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View Full Version : LeBron's Drano Beer finds T.O. a home



SteelCrazy
07-15-2010, 10:49 AM
http://views.washingtonpost.com/theleag ... tarcy.html (http://views.washingtonpost.com/theleague/panelists/2010/07/is-to-done-tarcy.html)

I am a Cleveland Browns fan. This an open letter to the Pittsburgh Steelers. I hate you. Please sign Terrell Owens.
I'll admit to some selfishness in my recommendation. As the summer of LeBron has caused this Cleveland native to stare with thirst at a bottle of Drano as if it was called Drano Beer, I am begging the Pittsburgh Steelers to sign Terrell Owens.
So Pittsburgh Steelers, have you you ever seen T.O. do pushups in his driveway? Those are Hall of Fame pushups. Although there are rumors that he has resorted to hydraulic lifts for the pushups and to Joan Rivers' plastic surgeon for the muscles, you must remember one important fact: you are the Pittsburgh Steelers.
T.O will be a distraction from Ben Roethlisberger's problems.
This, in fact, is a letter of kindness, much like your kindness when you "baptized" me in Iron City beer after a certain Art Modell sold his despicable soul for 30 pieces of silver on a tarmac in Baltimore. It's been more than a dozen years and I still can't quite get past that creepy feeling of three years with no actual way to hate you, and I can't get past the smell of that beer either. Or maybe it's just beer. But I digress.
Look, Pittsburgh Steelers -- I know that you need a distraction. I am a nice neighbor who wishes you ill yet feels your pain in being forced to cheer for a creep (hello Albert Belle), so let me cut to the chase - T.O. at the end of his career may be the perfect citizen. That's a disaster for you, so you can cut him as soon as he lets go of his walker.
The better case scenario is that he is exactly the lunatic you are looking for. In which case, you put him in front of a microphone whenever you can. And make him talk about your quarterback three times a week.
I believe this is a formula for success. Yes, I feel good with this plan.

ramblinjim
07-15-2010, 11:16 AM
:tt2 too funny.

flippy
07-15-2010, 11:31 AM
Call me crazy, but I still see TO as a decent option for us.

He'd be insurance for Ward's hammy. He'd take some pressure away from Wallace. He'd be better than ARE. And he'd take some heat off Ben.

frankthetank1
07-15-2010, 01:37 PM
Call me crazy, but I still see TO as a decent option for us.

He'd be insurance for Ward's hammy. He'd take some pressure away from Wallace. He'd be better than ARE. And he'd take some heat off Ben.

i actually agree. i have always and will always hate TO but at this point why the hell not? he would be super cheap to sign so we would have nothing to lose. i think a team like the steelers with a bunch of veteran guys who have won multiple SB's would be a great fit for him much like moss is for the pats. its a winning environment, he is much more prone to asanine antics with losers like the cowboys and bills. when players like that go to winning teams they usually shut their mouth especially in their twlight years. the eagles dont count as a winner because they havent won a sb in forever.

we also went from having a great group of wr's to having an ok group with a healthy ward. if we signed TO wallace would have no problems or far less problems getting open much like last season.

Shawn
07-15-2010, 02:35 PM
Call me crazy, but I still see TO as a decent option for us.

He'd be insurance for Ward's hammy. He'd take some pressure away from Wallace. He'd be better than ARE. And he'd take some heat off Ben.


I agree...and personally I still think he has a little left in the tank. The Steelers won't touch him with a 10 foot pole because of the whole Ben amd Holmes situation. If neither of those events happened...maybe. But, now that they have...the Steelers will be bent on PR and image repair. TO wouldn't help that. Can you imagine the headlines?

ghettoscott
07-15-2010, 02:47 PM
Call me crazy, but I still see TO as a decent option for us.

He'd be insurance for Ward's hammy. He'd take some pressure away from Wallace. He'd be better than ARE. And he'd take some heat off Ben.

yes sir... :Agree

Sugar
07-15-2010, 04:13 PM
It would be fantastic if TO were to win his first SB as a Steeler. That said, the Rooney's are too worried about their precious reputation to sign him.

Chadman
07-15-2010, 06:25 PM
T.O. generates his own publicity in order to maximise his earning potential.

It's always been about how much he can earn.

Chadman can honestly say that, if you know the beast before you unleash it, you often minimise the damage. T.O., we all know, will at some point do something dumb. Say something he shouldn't. So, as long as you are prepared for it, so long as your organisation can handle it- there is no problem adding a 'cancer' like T.O. on a short term basis.

Here's the thing- the Bills experience aside, when has T.O. ever not performed on the field? The dude is a beast, and gets paid accordingly, for a reason. He's older now, slower- but he can still open the field up for those speedy young WR's the Steelers have in waiting...

That said, he won't be in Black & Gold.

hawaiiansteel
07-15-2010, 10:06 PM
Call me crazy, but I still see TO as a decent option for us.


okay, you're crazy. :lol:

http://www.intelligentspeculator.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/crazy-frog.jpg

rpmpit
07-16-2010, 09:30 AM
I would love it if we signed T.O. He's still got the talent to be one of the best in the league. And maybe, just maybe, this whole "please give me a job" thing has taught him some humility.

But even if it hasn't, T.O. has never committed (or allegedly committed) a crime. At his worse, he called Jeff Garcia gay (and who among us hasn't seen the "Cleveland Sucks, Garcia Swallows" t-shirts?) and called Donovan soft. Oh, and he also complains to his qbs and the media that he wants the ball more. I remember hearing Swann say that he and Stallworth used to do anything they could for Bradshaw so he'd look their way more often. Even buying Terry donuts :D

Then again, Randy Moss was another cry baby, trouble making WR. The Pats were idiots for signing him :stirpot

SteelerNation1
07-16-2010, 10:57 AM
FWIW, Ted Bruschi said on SportsCenter last night that the Steelers could handle signing TO. Due to my intense hatred for that cheater Bruschi, I hope we don't sign him.

rpmpit
07-16-2010, 11:12 AM
FWIW, Ted Bruschi said on SportsCenter last night that the Steelers could handle signing TO. Due to my intense hatred for that cheater Bruschi, I hope we don't sign him.

Thanks for the info. I'd rather eat poop than agree with Bruschi. Screw T.O. Let the Redskins have him :evil:

frankthetank1
07-16-2010, 11:22 AM
FWIW, Ted Bruschi said on SportsCenter last night that the Steelers could handle signing TO. Due to my intense hatred for that cheater Bruschi, I hope we don't sign him.

Thanks for the info. I'd rather eat poop than agree with Bruschi. Screw T.O. Let the Redskins have him :evil:

:lol: :lol: haha thats kind of silly. i hate bruschi almost as much as rodney harrison but i could careless who says the steelers would be a good fit for TO. i agree regardless of who says it. what if bruschi said he thought the steelers will win the SB this season?

SteelerNation1
07-16-2010, 12:05 PM
what if bruschi said he thought the steelers will win the SB this season?
You know I love winning SB's as much as the next guy, but...
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: