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fordfixer
10-18-2009, 01:55 AM
AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD


To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last...

Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 A CP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.
P.S. Remember this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil society!

stlrz d
10-18-2009, 10:23 AM
http://www.snopes.com/crime/justice/mugger.asp

I believe this is something created to be passed around as a pro-CCW piece. Just look at the very bottom of the snopes article...this has supposedly taken place in 8 different places...and one of them is Scotland...isn't it illegal to own and/or carry in the UK?

Plus "the person this happened to" openly and freely admits to committing several crimes himself...he would have been easily traced through craigslist by the authorities.

fordfixer
10-18-2009, 12:59 PM
But its still funny

eniparadoxgma
10-19-2009, 06:40 PM
Yup. Still funny. I'm all for the pro-CCW message as well.

fordfixer
10-20-2009, 01:08 AM
Yup. Still funny. I'm all for the pro-CCW message as well.
:Agree :tt1 :tt1

Djfan
10-20-2009, 10:35 PM
Yup. Still funny. I'm all for the pro-CCW message as well.
:Agree :tt1 :tt1

Me too!

Love, your local heavily armed lover of freedom and safe neighborhoods.

SanAntonioSteelerFan
10-23-2009, 02:11 PM
Funny! But disagree strongly with the message that more guns on the street keep us safer.

Sure, all of US can be trusted with guns. But that won't help when our wife/mother/son/daughter comes home dead because some jerk with a weapon thought he was being disrespected while driving (or walking on the sidewalk, or ...).

There needs to be distance between feelings and the ability to act on them for many people.

IMHO!

Djfan
10-25-2009, 08:40 PM
Funny! But disagree strongly with the message that more guns on the street keep us safer.

Sure, all of US can be trusted with guns. But that won't help when our wife/mother/son/daughter comes home dead because some jerk with a weapon thought he was being disrespected while driving (or walking on the sidewalk, or ...).

There needs to be distance between feelings and the ability to act on them for many people.

IMHO!

Those guys already have guns on them. If they feared return fire, the problem might diminish.

SanAntonioSteelerFan
10-25-2009, 10:48 PM
Funny! But disagree strongly with the message that more guns on the street keep us safer.

Sure, all of US can be trusted with guns. But that won't help when our wife/mother/son/daughter comes home dead because some jerk with a weapon thought he was being disrespected while driving (or walking on the sidewalk, or ...).

There needs to be distance between feelings and the ability to act on them for many people.

IMHO!

Those guys already have guns on them. If they feared return fire, the problem might diminish.

No, I'm talking about the guys whose only recourse now is to pull up and cut you off on the road, and give you the finger. They would do more if they could, and if they had a gun , they would use it on some occasions.

Djfan
10-26-2009, 02:45 PM
Those guys already have guns on them. If they feared return fire, the problem might diminish.

No, I'm talking about the guys whose only recourse now is to pull up and cut you off on the road, and give you the finger. They would do more if they could, and if they had a gun , they would use it on some occasions.

Maybe. Maybe not. If the treat of violence didn't work then criminals wouldn't employ it in their interests.

On the other hand, do what I did and leave that nonsense.

RuthlessBurgher
10-27-2009, 03:28 PM
Those guys already have guns on them. If they feared return fire, the problem might diminish.

No, I'm talking about the guys whose only recourse now is to pull up and cut you off on the road, and give you the finger. They would do more if they could, and if they had a gun , they would use it on some occasions.

Maybe. Maybe not. If the treat of violence didn't work then criminals wouldn't employ it in their interests.

On the other hand, do what I did and leave that nonsense.

Treat of violence? Oh, threat of violence! A tiny little typo makes all the difference! :P

Djfan
10-28-2009, 02:37 PM
Treat of violence? Oh, threat of violence! A tiny little typo makes all the difference! :P

My bad. Kind of ironic, huh?